"I've got all the money I'll ever need if I die by four o'clock this afternoon." ~Henry Youngman
"There's so little money in my bank account, my scenic checks show a ghetto." ~Phyllis Diller
"I don't have a bank account, because I don't know my mother's maiden name." ~Paula Poundston
Heather's husband, Chad, was called into his bank to discuss his accounts.
"Your finances are in terrible shape," the banker stated.
"Your checking account is overdrawn, your loan is overdue."
"Yes, I know." said Chad. "It's my wife, Heather. She is out of control."
"Why do you allow your wife to spend more money than you have ?" asked the banker.
"Frankly," replied Chad with a deep sigh, "because I'd rather argue with you than with her."