*Men are NOT mind readers.
*Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
*Sunday sports It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..
*Crying is blackmail.
*Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
*Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question..
*Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
*Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
*If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
*If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
*You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
*Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
*ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
*If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.
*If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it's just not worth the hassle.
*If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
*When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .
*Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Football,Hunting, Fishing
*You have enough clothes.
*You have too many shoes.
*I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
*Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.